Churchillian Drift
noun phrase

- the widespread misattribution of quotes by obscure figures to more famous figures, usually of their time period

Triply

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PHRASE ORIGIN

“Churchillian Drift” is a term coined by British writer Nigel Rees in 1993.

The Internet is full of misinformation about who actually said what. Precise wording is never a priority and attribution errors get repeated a hundredfold.

Relying on the Internet for this kind of quotation research requires infinite patience and a determination not to believe what is presented as fact, just because a thousand websites say it is.

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WHAT CHURCHILL NEVER SAID

Due to Churchillian Drift, the following well-known quotations are frequently misattributed to Winston Churchill — together with the correct source:

- Agreement = “If two people agree on everything, one of them is unnecessary.” — no attribution.

- Common Language = “Britain and America are two nations divided by a common language.” — Oscar Wilde.

- Dog = “Every dog has his day.” — no attribution.

- Fanatic = “A fanatic is someone who won’t change his mind and won’t change the subject.” — no attribution.

- Hell = “If you’re going through hell, keep going.” — no attribution.

- Lunch = “There ain’t no free lunch.” — Rudyard Kipling.

- Golf = “A curious sport whose object is to put a very small ball in a very small hole with implements ill-designed for the purpose.” — no attribution.

- History = “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.” — George Santayana.

- Lies = “There are three kinds of lies: lies, damn lies and statistics.” — Benjamin Disraeli.

- Never = “Never Give In” or “Never give up.” — Maxims, Perseverance, St. Francis de Sales.

- Poison in Your Coffee = Nancy Astor: “If I were married to you, I’d put poison in your coffee.” Churchill: If I were your husband, I’d drink it.” — popularised by F.E. Smith (Lord Birkenhead), a much heavier drinker than Churchill.

- Prepositions, Ending Sentences in = “This is the kind of pedantic nonsense up with which I will not put” — Strand Magazine, unnamed author.

- Prisoner of War = “A prisoner of war is a man who tries to kill you and fails, and then asks you not to kill him.” — no attribution.

- Simple Tastes = “I am a man of simple tastes — I am quite easily satisfied with the best of everything.” — F.E. Smith, (Lord Birkenhead).

- Speech = “Please excuse the length of this letter, I had no time to write a short one.” — Blaise Pascal.

- The Irish = “We have always found the Irish a bit odd. They refuse to be English.” — no attribution.

- Troubles = “Most of the things I have worried about never ended up happening.” — Mark Twain or Thomas Jefferson.

- Whisky = “If you mean whisky, the devil’s brew, the poison scourge, the bloody monster that defiles innocence, dethrones reason, destroys the home, creates  misery and poverty … I am opposed to it with every fibre of my being. However, if you mean the oil of conversation, the philosophic wine, the elixir of life … Then my friend, I am absolutely, unequivocally in favour of it.” — no attribution, though Churchill might have shared the sentiment.

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SMUGGLE OWAD into an English conversation, say something like:

“Beware of CHURCHILLIAN DRIFT — there are hundreds of misattributed quotes to Churchill and other famous figures floating around the internet.”

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